As my relationship with my husband improves, oddly enough, my self esteem worsens. I thought when my marriage got better I would feel better about my relationship. The truth is, the more my husband changes for the better and does things for me...and the more my kids grow up and want a parent who's able to play with them without hurting...the more I realize that this "eating" thing I have going on is affecting more than just me.
I'm disgusted with how I look and feel. My heath is getting worse and as shallow as it sounds, so are my looks.
I know this much:
1. I am a good person. I have a caring heart and soul. This caring heart and soul deserves a beautiful and healthy body to reside in.
2. My husband deserves a wife who cares about her body. My husband has vowed to love me no matter my size, but he doesnt deserve to add my weight issues to his plate.
3. My kids deserve a mother who cares about her body. All they want to do is play and I can no longer even walk without getting out of breath.
4. I'm scared. My health and pain level in my back has been overwhelming lately. I'm honestly scared for my life. People at my age should not feel like this.
I'm on the right path. I've been told that I'm ready now based on these things I'm feeling. I KNOW I overeat and now I just need to fix it. I'm praying for strength.
This is the begninning of my journey. I hope you will join me for the ride!
*Tonight I'm going to take my first photo, weight and measurements. Tomorrow's goal is to suck it up, and post the information.*
To be inspired....
About Me
- Mom23QTs
- I was born in South Carolina, raised in Connecticut and have since resided in MA, WA, MS and FL. I'm an office manager for a research and development firm in Daytona Beach Florida. I am also a Florida Notary. In 2000 I married my husband, 2001 I had my son Clay, 2005 I had my son Sky and 2007 I had my daughter Nina. I'm interested in music, family, politics and much more.
Starting Weight
Current Weight
My Goal Weight
2 comments:
Just stopping in to wish you the best of luck with your journey! You have taken the hardest step and that is always the 1st step.
Good luck!!
*huggles*
=0)
Way to go Jess. I think you get those genes from me as I also need to drop a few lbs like maybe 50. I was doing good but have fallen behind now and need to get back on the band wagon. Let's do this thing together. 50 lbs to go and counting.
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